If you spend most of your days exercising your fear instead of exercising your faith, then of course your fear will be stronger! Reference here.
I often wish there was a magic wand, a little pill or some sort of formula – and viola, you’re sorted. It takes so much work to exercise your faith – especially for someone, like me, who is naturally more reserved and fearful. Yeah, I was always that kid who used to tip my toes in the water before swimming, and took ages to pluck up the courage to get in, while all the other kids were jumping in and having a ball, I was stuck on the side too scared to do anything.
And my entire life has been like that – hanging back in fear, while everyone else moved forward with their lives.
However, today for Gratitude Monday, I want to express my gratitude that I started this journey. Because, as tough as what it has been to find that soul shift, and keep on keeping on when often I just wished I had arrived, I am starting to see some dividends pay off.
Just this past weekend, firstly, we had such a busy weekend, but not once did I feel anxious or nervous or fearful. In fact, I had a great weekend. Do you know what an achievement that is for me? To be able to relax and just simply enjoy myself? Without these thoughts bombarding my mind like bombs dropping during WWII? It was awesome. But, yesterday morning, after a function out the night before, hubby and I got up before Baby Girl and we had breakfast together and enjoyed some coffee together before she woke up. Once again, do you know what an amazing progress that is for me? I can only say, from the bottom of my heart, thank you, Lord! As much as we think we can control ourselves, we probably can’t – not without a little help from above. And I am truly grateful the growth I have seen in myself, resulting in growth in my marriage and my parenting, and I am so grateful! I know that situations may arise in the future that will give rise to fear and anxiety, but the more I am able to overcome, the more I will be able to overcome.
So for my growth, and for an amazing weekend, dear Lord, I thank you!