Gratitude – 18th November

Do you know that God loves you?  Not in a theological, airy-fairy kind of way, but in a “I am changed because God loves me” kind of way.  I think that all too often we think about God loving us, more than actually knowing that He loves.

How many of us actually know that He loves us?

I don’t believe many of us.  It’s all in our heads, and not a lot of it is in our hearts.  A little while ago I completed Sarah Ball from Virtuous Woman Exposed’s Fearless in 21 Days, and one of her blog posts has sort of been haunting me.  And the reason it has been haunting me is because of the truth of it.  There are many things I know well – my anxiety, my triggers, our financial battles, reading, watching TV, work.  But God – God isn’t really one of them.  Because if I truly knew God’s love, I wouldn’t fret over all the things that I do.  I would relax in His love, knowing that in the end it will all work out – because that is what He has promised.

Then I had a dream…

I was standing in the basement of a house.  It was a house I had never been to before.  I entered to the upper room of the house to explore further.  It was a nice house, full of everything you needed for comfort and security and in the house stood a man.  The man turned to me and said “welcome to OUR father’s house.”
“OH! That’s where we are, my Father’s house!” I thought, I got excited, I had never actually met my father before.
This man showed me around the home and could not stop talking about how amazing OUR father was.  He really knew him, and I was a bit embarrassed that I didn’t know him at all.  Then the door began to open and everyone in the room stood at attention as if royalty were arriving.  The man said excitedly, “FATHER”S HOME!!!!!”
And in walked the father.
The father went straight to the man, who was obviously his son.  He held his face in his hands and the look of love and pride and adoration over his son was jaw dropping.  I had never witnessed such a powerful exchange of love in my life.  No Hollywood movie ever came close.  I was in awe, mesmerized by it and then I was saddened.
I stood at attention, afraid to be noticed, or doing something wrong.  What was the protocol for Father coming home?  I didn’t know.  My thoughts were very clear…  “WOW, there is no way OUR father will ever love me as much as he loves his son.”  My head hung in shame and my hands fidgeted behind my back.  I was so ashamed to be there, I wanted to run.
But before my thought was complete, the father came and stood before me, like an officer inspects his troop.  I tensed, and he lifted my face and he looked at me.  Like, he really really looked at me.  His eyes were filled with the most intense adoration, the most furious love I had ever felt.  I still have a hard time articulating it, and my eyes are too blurry with tears to the see the keys as I type this revelation.
His love for me was as intense and real as it was for his son.  In this dream I never knew my father, but he knew me, and he loved me passionately.  Not one ounce of his being was disappointed in me, or disapproving.
I awoke from this dream completely changed.  No one witnesses the love of God face to face without being transformed completely.
I knew this dream came as a direct message from heaven.
He loves me, He really really really deeply patiently loves me, and there was NOTHING that I could do, or say, or be that will ever change that.
And so today, I am grateful for:
  • This awesome fact, this great revelation, that God truly does love us.  Each and every one of us.  And even though we don’t know Him as well as what we should, He still – quite simply – loves us.
  • That in Christ Jesus I don’t have to fret or worry or panic or “what-if” every situation I come across.  Jesus is already there, and He’s got this covered.
  • That God loves you.  You may not know Him, or even have a desire to know Him, but He still loves you.  And He knows everything about you and He still loves you.  Spend some time getting to know Him.
  • That in all my busyness – God is with me, cheering me on, loving me, and knowing what is best for me.  Even when I don’t have time for Him, He still loves me.
  • That every fiber of my being is loved and adored by God – this mighty God who created the Earth and the Heavens in six days, and rested on the seventh, loves everything about me.  I can learn to relax in His love and trust in His omniscience, omnipresent and omnipotence.

I have so much to be grateful for.



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