Top 5 Reasons to Love the Unlovable

Top 5 Reasons to Love the Unlovable

By Fawn Weaver on Wednesday, November 28, 2012


I love people.  Those from all walks of life bring happiness to my own.  But every now and again, I come across someone who makes it a little more difficult to love (or like for that matter).  But I do it anyway.  It’s not always easy.  As a matter of fact, sometimes is downright uncomfortable, but I know how much disliking a person can adversely impact my own life so I do my best to take the high road.

My mother used to say, “If you don’t want a person to get your goat, don’t tell them where it’s tied up.”  It’s a great quote, but for those like me who have no poker face whatsoever, it can prove to be more than a notion.  But here is something I have found that works.


1. It’s good for your health.

Getting upset or frustrated with a person -even if you hold it inside- impacts you more than it will ever affect them.  It is estimated that 98% of diseases come from or are exacerbated by stress.  Ninety-eight percent.  When you get frustrated with the customer service representative on the telephone who doesn’t seem interested in giving any…ahem…service, how long does it take you to cool after that exchange is over?  And how long do you think it took them to move on the moment the call ended?  The stress of getting worked up over a person simply isn’t worth it.

2. You never know what’s going on in their life.  

When my father was passing away, there were moments when I was all smiles and there were times when I was incredibly somber.  Those days were a bit of a roller coaster.  If you’d met me during one moment, you might have loved me.  If you’d crossed my path during another, you may have thought terrible things about me.  That person who cut you off on the freeway, you have no idea what might be going on in their life at that moment.  Yes, it’s frustrating and yes some people are simply inconsiderate, but some are just going through a tough time and it’s impossible for you to know which is which so it’s best to presume innocence.

3. God would have it no other way. 

The golden rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,” is the crux of every major religion.  It may be worded differently than it is in my Christian faith, but it means the same.  Are you kind all the time?  Are you loving all the time?  Are you respectful and considerate all the time?  If you are like me and the answer is no, then the same grace God extends to us is the same grace we should extend to others.  After all, it would be quite tragic if God treated us with as little patience and grace as we sometimes treat others.

4. You needed someone to love you when you were unlovable.

I know we’d all like to believe we’re the kindest, most loving, friendliest person we know.  But just because we believe it doesn’t make it so.  I know there are times when I act entitled, impatient, disrespectful and overall unkind.  Thank God it’s not as often as it once was but I’m a constant work in progress.  We are all constant works in progress.  Think about that person or persons who were loving toward you when you know you were not a lovable person.  Now, duplicate that for all the difficult people you encounter along this road of life.

5. Being kind increases your own happiness. 

This reason may sound selfish but it’s still one of my favorites.  When you get frustrated or are unkind to someone, what happens to you?  Neck gets tighter?  Shoulders tense up?  Jaw clinches a little tighter?  Do your inhales and exhales get a little shorter?  Any of this sounding familiar?  When you are kind to someone, regardless of how they treat you, your mood remains light and your day continues to be great.  You are in full control of your emotions and consequently, you are able to continue to choose happiness.  Because happiness is, after all, a powerful choice.

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

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