My negativity

Thinking (Photo credit: Moyan_Brenn_BE_BACK_IN_SEPTEMBER)

My negativity.

Shock, horror… the other night my hubby told me I’m always negative.  And I was totally floored.  I mean, you know how hard I have been working on looking at things positively, being positive and now that I’ve realised that it is a state of being that supersedes even your deepest thoughts, I had thought I had made some progress.  You see, I think I’m finally starting to understand that it’s not trying to be positive, you just actually have to be positive – and if you are positive, you don’t have to try to think about it, or try to do it, you ARE it.  In fact, you don’t even have to work at it.  You just are.

But for some of us, you have to start somewhere and I guess that if you are plagued by negativity, then changing the way that you think is the best place to start.  And you keep working at it until you are positive – not just thinking about it or trying, but it actually becomes who you are and therefore it’s not an issue you give the slightest bit of thought to.  You have arrived.

So, imagine my shock when my hubby told me I’m always negative.  You were discussing going to movies this weekend and there are a number of really good 3D movies showing at present, and I say to my hubby, well it doesn’t really matter – I can’t see 3D anyway.  And he looked at me and said, “does the very first thing that comes out of your mouth about yourself always have to be negative?”

Me, negative?  Never…

And I realised he was right (sure hope he’s not reading this:-))…

I never give myself or my life any credit.  Oh, I try to, but deep down inside, I just don’t believe it.  My positivity hasn’t yet infiltrated and become part of who I am.

I suppose the best example I can give are those people who put on a pair of running shoes, but have never run in their lives before and come back after an hour and did 10 km’s.  Natural athletes.

But, then you get me.  I’m the one who puts on my running shoes and I never get out the front door.  Now, it doesn’t mean that the running bug can’t bite and that I’ll never run 10 kilometres – it simply means that for me, it’s not a natural inclination.  In fact, I did run 10 kilometres once when I was a member of Run / Walk for Life.  And so I know I can do it again.

And so it is with being positive and viewing and loving yourself in a positive light – it may not be a natural inclination initially, but keep working at it and eventually it will be.


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