Out of my comfort zone…
I am a homebody. In fact, I love being at home. I love my house. I love spending the day at home reading, or watching TV, and just relaxing, pottering around here and there and just enjoying the quiet. I can be – although I am not always – but I can be my own best friend. I love just spending quiet days with hubby and baby girl.
I can put my nose into a book (how does one phrase that with a Kindle?), and just pass away the time enjoying a good story. I love stories, and I can hear or read a good story over, and over and over again. It is just who I am. I find it so relaxing. Hubby cannot understand why I love to hear a story I have already heard, but I get caught up in the feel of the story, I hear the details over and I just love it.
The problem with this is that I need people too. And I can get so caught up in spending time by myself that I forget my need for people and then all of a sudden I have this yearning to be out and about and interacting with people – often this can catch me unawares, but God made us to be social creatures, to interact – to give and to take in relationships. God did not make us to be by ourselves. I tend to forget that. Often. Especially after a hard week at work, come weekend, I want to relax – the best way I know how to.
The other day hubby mentioned to me that we need to get Baby Girl out and about socialising more. I totally agree with him. Being an only child, we need to constantly put her in situations where she can make friends and interact with people. Yes, she does get that at school, but school (like work for me) can become a safety zone – she will feel comfortable socialising there because she knows the environment and the people. We need to get her going on play dates and playing with friends. She is fortunate to be in a good school where she can make some really good friends.
This is where I need to step out of my comfort zone – I need to reach out to those moms and arrange play dates for Baby Girl. It is frightening, firstly because the hardest thing for me is to approach someone. Anyone. Even people I know well. It’s just easier to be and do on my own (except for hubby who is so part of who I am, he is the only exception to this rule). I cannot just approach people – hubby gets so frustrated with me, and I can understand why, because this leaves all the pressure on him, but it’s just something I have always battled with. I suppose being inherently shy would do that to one, but it is time for that to change. People are just people. Everyone is just trying to make the most of the life they have been given. And I know this, but it still causes me much anxiety (and yet, I must just add, that there has never been a social situation that I have been to that caused me to feel nervous beforehand that afterwards I didn’t say I enjoyed it).
Anyway, unexpectedly, one of the mom’s from Baby Girl’s class has asked that baby girl come over for a play date. Perhaps the good Lord above is trying to tell me something. Anyway, I am a bit nervous, firstly because I don’t know how comfortable I feel about the idea of baby girl spending a day at someone else’s house. Apparently, both her and her husband work, and the three girls (this little girl has an older sister) will be looked after by their full-time nanny. I have no problem with this – I was practically raised by my nanny. But still – it is a stranger’s home. As hubby said though, there is enough of a frame of reference there to know that it will be okay.
Secondly, I’m nervous because Baby Girl has never been on a play date without hubby or me there with her. This mom is talking about the whole day. So, we’ve arranged to meet at their house after work tomorrow, just to “introduce” baby girl to the environment and to check with her that she will be okay. Fortunately, this little girl and Baby Girl are wonderful friends at school, so I do think that’ll make it easier. Yes, I am nervous about going to this woman’s house – what will we talk about for an hour? Silly, I know, she is a lovely lady. I am sure it will be fine.
Thirdly, Baby Girl is growing up. She is turning four next week, and I don’t know if I’m ready for her to be growing up so quickly. I want to keep her small and cute and sweet and innocent for ever (doesn’t every mom???). But, yeah, I so totally want to do that. I can’t believe how quickly the last four years have gone.
So, here’s to stepping out of my comfort zone (raises a glass of champagne…)
The Baby Mama
P.S. I know I can do this, having a baby in the first place was totally stepping out of my comfort zone, and I seemed to have managed that quite well.
You just have to laugh – each day I get these daily readings emailed to me, called “Family Love on which to build”. And today’s reading, “Spending some time apart can teach independence and give everyone a little relief from the routine. Therefore, if you have a clean, safe place to leave your children for a while, by all means, do it. You’ll be refreshed and better able to handle your usual ‘homework’ when you return” – Solid Answers
I received this about 10 seconds AFTER I published this post. Now I think the Good Lord above is definitely trying to tell me something – perhaps it is time that hubby and I start spending more quality time together – like going to see a movie (can’t remember when last we did that…)