It’s been a long time since I’ve blogged. But, there have been periods of greater absences, so I guess this is not too bad.
Baby Girl – after all, this blog is supposed to be about Baby Girl – is growing so beautifully. She, apparently, has grown quite tall over Christmas. I say apparently because I have not noticed this growth spurt but at our first swimming lesson of the new season, I had about three or four comments about how tall she has gotten. The swimming went well, albeit still too cold to really enjoy it thoroughly. Hopefully we’ll get summer here in Port Elizabeth – at some point. I find it somewhat amusing that the temperatures all across the country are at 28º, 36 º, and little old Port Elizabeth is at 17º, 16º and Friday will be a whopping 15º. Today is nice though. But today, I am at work.
Anyway, back to Baby Girl – she enjoyed her swimming and seems to socialise so nicely with other kids. We went to Cape Town over this last long weekend and Baby Girl and a whale of a time. Her poor Grandparents on that side of the country were exhausted and although probably sad to see us leave, probably a bit more relaxed. Poor Baby Girl doesn’t quite understand that we don’t all have her energy levels. Well, not even the Energiser Bunny has her energy levels. But, I wouldn’t have her any other way. She is so interested in everything and nothing holds her back. As my hubby says, she has a heart of a lion. She will help feed the birds, and sweep, and help Granny hang the washing and help pick up snails and worms from the plants, and help weed – she won’t sit back, she likes to get involved. She’s just like her Dad and that is exactly what I love about her.
There is this interest in life and what is going on that just astounds me – I get nervous and scared and prefer to crawl away. But, first my Hubby and now Baby Girl are teaching me about the joys of really getting involved. And yes, it is exhausting. And yes, I am tired. And yes, there are those days that I just wish I could just have half an hour to just veg. But, you know what? At the end of the day, when all is said and done, I wouldn’t have it any other way. They fill up my life, me, who I am. I feel lost without them, alone and even though I need me time and I must be disciplined in taking me time, I want them there. No much how much energy both of them radiates?
My weight is still an ongoing issue (this blog can be about me – just a little). I have now cut down my two scrambled eggs in the morning and I’m only having one. My oats at 09:30 I dump one teaspoon out into the bin before I start eating – trying to fool my system into eating less. Soon, I will be dumping two teaspoons. The idea is that eventually I will cut down on eating meals between meals, but rather have an apple or a banana or something more like a snack. And then I’ll lose weight and be all nice and trim like I was before I fell pregnant. We live in hope. And besides which, on the way back from Cape Town, hubby had an egg mayo sandwich at about 03:00 in the morning and then didn’t eat until supper. And I thought, how lovely to be able to focus on what needs to be done and to eat when hungry – not like me who is so scared about not eating that I eat everything in sight. Seriously silly of me – I know, but I am working on it. Every day this is what invades my thought and my mind. I want my body back and Philippians 4:13 tells me I can do all things through Christ Jesus so I know that I can do this too.
In Cape Town we caught the new bus system into town with my hubby’s folks and baby girl in tow. She was such a good little girl on the bus and we caught a water taxi and saw how the other half of society live – where a mere flat costs R 6 000 000 (yes, that’s SIX MILLION RANDS). Unless I win the lotto (which I do also live in hope for and do actually buy tickets – on occasion), I will never see that kind of money to just spend on a flat. Although you never know – I always say you never know what surprise God has around the next corner for you. Hubby has some amazing business ideas and is touching base and making contact with big client names – and you never know what one contact will lead to or what one connection will make in the long-term. I said to hubby on the weekend that we are facing a huge mountain financially, and all we can do is climb it one step at a time. We will get to the top one day. And it’s frustrating and tiring and exhausting and the pressure feels insurmountable at times (especially when you have a child that you only want to give the best of everything too), but we will get to the top of this mountain. It is what it is, but we cannot give up hope that things will get better and that going out to dinner won’t cost us the earth in terms of the sacrifice made just to go to Mike’s Kitchen.
And to top it all off, hubby and I need to start lending our thoughts to which schools to apply to next year for Baby Girl. We are very keen on St Dominic’s Priory, which is just around the corner from us and I really like the idea of Baby Girl attending one school from Grade 0 to Grade 12, but they are very expensive and they don’t have anything during the holidays which will be another expense or situation that will need to be dealt with. Or there is Charlo Primary which is a normal government school and obviously I have my concerns considering South Africa is listed 141 out of 145 countries in terms of education level (with only Afghanistan, Yemen and Libya behind us). But, they are a lot cheaper than Priory and they have holiday care every holiday except for December/January. Which will be much easier for us – and they are also relatively close to us. Someone at work suggested Clarendon Primary School – I will need to do research and compare costs and see where we stand with what we can afford and holiday care, etc. Being a parent isn’t easy and making the right decisions or allowing life to make decisions for you, based on our financial situation, isn’t easy. And to be honest – just doesn’t seem fair.
Then I am reminded that I have so many blessing and so many things to be grateful for that climbing this mountain is totally doable. And the high at the top will be worth it. And right by my side will be my hubby and our little Baby Girl.
The Baby Mama