Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for

Baby Girl! This is my Favorite!

This one is easy – my mother.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my mother to bits and am very grateful for all her help with Baby Girl and just generally through my whole life thus far.  BUT, she tried to make me a carbon copy of her – I was never allowed to be me.  And the manipulation and mind games – well, I still have to sift through what is real, what is a mind game, what is manipulation to get to the through to the truth.  I can never accept anything at face value – I always have to analyse and find out if there is an angle that I need to know about.  She also competed with me growing up – she was better friends with my friends than what I was.  They used to come visit to see her, not me.  I felt like I had no life, no me, except through her – no wonder I have self-esteem issues.  But, I love her and would rather have her in my life as is than not at all.  But, there are some things that I need to forgive her for, accept that this is how it is, and move on.

The Baby Mama

P.S.  Divorcing my father two months after I got married because she could see how happy I was just proves my point.  That is also something else I need to forgive her for.


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